At the end of my conference last week I participated in a golf and learn experience. I hop in the golf cart awaiting the start of the first golf scramble I have ever participated in. My cart partner introduces himself and shares about his experience as a golfer.
He plays three times a week.
Me, I am lucky to play three times a year. On one hand I was glad because at least we would have a good ball to play every time and a better chance to win. . . . my competitive side. On the other hand, my fragile ego was worried about looking like a fool because I play poorly.
We played nine holes and during those nine holes I learned a few principles that transfer to leading both myself and others.
- Teamwork. One of the individuals in our group had never swung a club before our time together. We spent time on the driving range beforehand teaching her the basics. On one hole as we approached the green her shot was the best. Sometimes people on a team we wouldn’t expect will bring us the best results . . . be sure we don’t limit others.
- Appreciate and don’t compare. As a naturally competitive individual I tend to compare another person’s positive results to mine that aren’t as good and get frustrated. What if instead I appreciate their strengths and successes and use that as encouragement to continue to grow and push forward toward my goal. Comparing our results and basing our value as a person on results will only lead us down a path of decreased performance in the long run. Learn from others and get results based on your skills.
- Relax and don’t rush. As I said I am not a very good golfer, but I know this much: if I relax I perform much better. Just like I have a job to do, so does the club and when I would step up, take a deep breath and just swing I did much better than when I was tense and trying to hit the junk out of the ball.
As leaders when we have a relaxed but focused mindset we perform at a much higher level than when we are constantly tense and forcing our agenda. This relaxed state enables us to listen and think into the answers more effectively.
During my time at this golf and learn I was challenged to reflect on what I had learned over the previous few days of the conference. A quote from James Allen really stuck out to me:
“You don’t get what you want, you get who you are.”
Are we the kind of leaders who will attract others? This quote and the above thoughts challenged me to think what kind of leader am I becoming? Do I focus on the external too much when I really need to pay attention to who I am more than anything else?
What about you? How can you appreciate and empower the strengths of those you lead? How can you relax for greater effectiveness? What can you do to stop the comparison game? How can you learn from other’s success and continue to grow? Lead well at work and home.
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