Blog - Page 11 of 60 - Wheeler Coaching Systems

Nov

2022

Gratitude in Leadership

Let’s be honest. As a leader you are under a lot of pressure. You don’t have time to obsess over positive thinking because you are a leader and you want to get stuff done!

You’ve got goals to reach. Deadlines to meet. Teams to lead. People who expect a lot out of you. The pressure can be high and what does this gratitude have to do with leadership.

“It’s your job, just do it. I don’t have to thank you or show gratitude.”

How many of you feel this way? Constantly or maybe just occasionally.

Maybe you know someone who leads you and you can tell he or she feels this way. Could a little bit of gratitude help?

Research

I’m not going to nerd out on this, but I will share a study I found on the effects of gratitude on mental wellbeing.¹ Without going into the details because you can read it yourself, the researchers found five minutes of gratitude meditation lowered heart rates and improved mental health.

Another research study took 300 mostly university students and divided them into three groups. All received counseling services, but only one was instructed to write a gratitude letter each week. After four to twelve weeks those writing the weekly gratitude letter reported significantly improved mental health.²

These two studies (and I’m sure there are more) show gratitude is beneficial. So, allow me to suggest a few ways to apply this to leadership.

Focus on the Opportunity

With every difficulty there is the possibility of an opportunity. Did you know during economic downturns companies such as General Electric, IBM, Disney and more were born?³ This means these leaders must have seen an opportunity amidst the difficulties in society at the time. What helped them see the opportunity?

A choice. They chose to look for the opportunity amidst the difficulty instead of focusing only on the problems around them. What we focus on expands so if we ask where are the opportunities and keep a posture of positive gratitude for what we have we will see possibilities amidst the problems.

Our Thinking Impacts Our Energy

“How we think we feel has a definite effect on how we actually feel physically.” Norman Vincent Peale

It’s been said there are no two good days in a leader’s life. Leaders deal with problems. Are we focusing on how we “have to” do something or do we shift to an attitude of gratitude saying we “get to” do it?

I was thinking about my day one morning and I made that simple shift. I get to . . . This simple shift not only impacted my mood, but also my physical energy. This is a choice we all can make every day. Try shifting from “have to” to “get to” and see what happens.

Gratitude Increases Morale

I hope you aren’t like me and naturally lean toward the critical side. I confess, I am very critical. I must choose to see the positive. When it comes to people I work alongside I find the more I express genuine and specific appreciation it strengthens our relationships and keeps morale high.

As the leader you can be a thermostat. Set the temperature by looking for ways to show gratitude to those you lead. It doesn’t have to be big, but it should always be authentic and as specific as possible. Try it for a week and see how the temperature of your team improves.

Which of these do you need to work on in the next twenty-four hours? Need a tool to assess the temperature of your team? Contact me to learn about The Maxwell Leadership Game which is a great tool to start creating an environment of gratitude. In the meantime, focus on what you are thankful for today. Lead Well.

Nov

2022

Teams That Are Healthy

Teams are everywhere. A team can consist of two people or two hundred. The larger the team the more challenging to get them to work together effectively. Let me illustrate.

55 vs. 15

Fifty-five is the number of players on an NFL team while fifteen is the number of players on an NBA team.

16 v 4

Sixteen coaches including the head coach and not including trainers, etc. lead NFL teams while the head coach and three assistants lead NBA teams. With the ratios I’ve just shared you would think it is easier to build a healthy NBA team than NFL team. We may think the same at work that a smaller team should become healthy and well-functioning easier than a larger team.

Three factors will decide which one is healthier. Each of these start with the leader and those around him or her.

“[T]hree conditions are essential to a group’s effectiveness: trust . . . , group identity, and . . . group efficacy.” Druskatt & Wolff

Emotional Intelligence

“[E]motional competencies were found to be twice as important in contributing to excellence as pure intellect and expertise.”

Daniel Goleman

The first piece to a healthy team is self-aware individuals. Emotional intelligence is simply awareness of one’s emotions in a manner that individuals can sense them and control them.

Maybe you have been in a situation where you feel your emotions rise and want to explode. You pause for a minute recognizing this explosion may make you feel better but will not positively impact the conversation so you pause and reset. Individuals with a lack of emotional intelligence fail to have the capacity to be aware of these feelings.

We are emotional individuals and failure to be in tune with our emotions hinders our ability to connect. If emotions are an area that is awkward for you then take time when you feel emotion to identify what the emotion is and then ask “what is making me . . . . frustrated, angry, etc.” This pause will help you show up in an emotionally healthier way with your team.

Social Intelligence

A team consists of individuals. These individuals work together to accomplish a common goal. Emotional intelligence is awareness of our emotions and having the capacity to respond appropriately. Social intelligence is awareness of others’ emotions and the capacity to respond in a manner that brings the group together.

Imagine you are leading a meeting and you sense tensions rising as you discuss an important issue. A leader with good social intelligence will be able to keep the conversation moving forward in a productive manner. Different perspectives are helpful to a team, but a socially intelligent leader must have the ability to lead the team through problem solving scenarios in a manner that brings unity and not division.

Trust

“Speed happens when people . . . truly trust each other.” Edward Marshall

In his book The Speed of Trust, Stephen M. R. Covey suggests trust is a function of character and competence. When each member of a team is competent in what they do the leader will be able to trust them to accomplish work correctly. A team member’s character is demonstrated by accomplishing the work accurately and on time. Both dramatically impact the health of a team.

As you evaluate your leadership how are you doing in each of these areas? How aware are you of your feelings and what is the cause of them in the moment, so you don’t explode and create an unhealthy environment? Do you need to be more aware of the emotions of the team so you can help them navigate problems more effectively? Where would you rate your team on trust on a scale of one to ten? We all have areas to grow. If you need help thinking into ways to break through any of these barriers with your team contact me and let’s discover how I can serve you. Keep building your team and growing as a leader. Lead Well.

Goleman, Daniel. Working With Emotional Intelligence. Bantam Books: New York, 1998.

Druskat, V. and Wolff, S. “Building the Emotional Intelligence of Groups.” Harvard Business Review, March 2001. https://hbr.org/2001/03/building-the-emotional-intelligence-of-groups retrieved 1/18/22

Covey, Stephen M. R. The Speed of Trust. Free Press: New York, 2006.

Nov

2022

Leadership Lessons From a Firehouse Tour

I was in the newly constructed firehouse of our community during a Rotary meeting and while I was listening, I picked up some lessons on leadership.

Honor Tradition

This new headquarters was finished last year. The construction is beautiful and it includes useful new technology, yet there were some key areas where they did not want to forget their past.

This new building is taller than the old one so they had a pole that had a seam. Why? They wanted to keep the old one and extended it. . . . tradition.

As you come to the building and then as you enter it there are monuments to remember the past. One is a wooden case with memorabilia as a reminder of a firefighter who lost his life while pushing a colleague out of the way of a falling wall. The second is a boulder with a bell in memory of another firefighter. Throughout the building are symbols that honor the past.

As leaders we constantly thing “what’s next.” The tension is we need to also honor and cherish what “next” has been built on. Tension between change and tradition exists, but the tradition of the past created the foundation for the future we are seeking to build. Honoring it honors the leaders that built it and reminds us of the lessons learned.

Personal Identity

As we toured the firehouse two designs exemplified the firehouse’s personal identity. In the garage where the trucks park a giant logo was on the wall. This was not a generic logo, but a design specifically as an identity for this fire station. I learned every station in the community has a unique design to identify themselves.

The second design was along the stairs. The walls were painted with a map of the city and giant shadows of firefighters. These shadows were the shadows of some of the firemen on their staff.

As leaders we can create unique ways for our teams to feel special. Creating an identity that is unique to your team builds pride and strengthens buy-in. Take time to allow the team to create that identity instead of just giving it to them.

Clear Roles

At one point the captain described an emergency situation. As he shared the fact that in emergency situations everyone was quiet something he said jumped out at me.

Everyone knows their role and responsibility.

When a group knows their role, stays in that role, and does their job it seems less communication may be needed. As leaders we need to take the time to clearly clarify roles and expectations so when emergencies arise everyone can calmly focus on solving the problem. When we fail to have clarity beforehand chaos ensues when the problem arises.

The first two observations relate to culture and the final relates to performance. How are you doing in each of these areas? Which of these areas do you need to improve in the next thirty days? Not sure how you are doing in these areas? Maybe having your team together in a safe, non-threatening, and interactive environment may open up conversation. Contact me to learn about The Leadership Game to build your team and think into your culture and leadership. Lead Well!

Oct

2022

Habit or Hype

I was listening to the Maxwell Leadership podcast recently on motivation. During the podcast Mark Cole, CEO of Maxwell Leadership suggested that our motivation can be driven by habit or hype. Allow me to dig into this a little bit.

Hype

We have all been to an event where we get excited about the program, product, or vision that someone has cast and we are on this emotional high. That gets us started and gives fuel . . . for a period of time, but eventually it fades. We then look for that next hype to keep us going. The problem with being fueled by hype . . . we are always looking for the next “hit” and it is externally driven.

Habit

When I made the shift from employee to business owner, I suddenly had freedom in my schedule. This can be dangerous. The good thing is I had a morning routine that served me well for years. I kept that routine with a similar time and then got ready for my day whether I was working at home or had meetings elsewhere. These habits served me well during 2020 when the lockdown occurred. Habits are what keep us consistent, provide a process to accomplish what the hype got us excited about, and are internally driven.

Moving from Hype to Habit

Hold Your Vision

In his classic book Think and Grow Rich Napoleon Hill discusses the idea of a burning desire that drives people to accomplish their goals. This desire can be awakened by hype, but we must reinforce it with habit.

Allow me to illustrate. Maybe you meet a motivational fitness trainer and do one workout with him or her. You felt inspired by the individual because they painted a picture of where you could be in this area of your life. The next day you go to the gym and maybe even keep it up for a week. Then life happens and you forget why you wanted to get in better shape.

Write down the reason why you got excited and what your ultimate goal is. Put it somewhere you will see it daily. This small exercise will help you hold your vision to develop the right habits.

Develop Discipline

In his book Good to Great author Jim Collins discusses how going from good to great requires:

“a cumulative process – step by step, action by action, decision by decision, turn by turn of the flywheel – that adds up to sustained and spectacular results.”

Hype is the emotion, but discipline is required daily to turn the wheel that makes the dream reality. Think of a water wheel. There is a steady stream of water continually pouring into the wheel that makes it turn.

To accomplish your vision there are daily disciplines like that water that will make it reality. Meeting new people, thinking into the business, investing resources, sharing the vision and more. The dream is exciting, but the daily discipline is what gets the results.

Persistently Pursue

Recently I have been watching The Last Dance about the Chicago Bulls last championship season. As I have watched it, I am amazed by the intense persistence Michael Jordan had in his desire to win championships. He held the vision and had the disciplines to make him great, but he had to be persistent with his teammates to get them to raise their level of performance.

As they interviewed him he said:

“I wanted to win, but I wanted them to win and be a part of it as well . . . I pulled people when they don’t want to be pulled. I challenged people when they don’t want to be challenged.”

As a leader inspiring is part of the responsibility. We all want people to be intrinsically motivated, but at times we may have to persistently pursue them by encouraging them to improve themselves and reminding the team why they are doing what they do daily. Some people need pushed, others need pulled, and some simply need a reminder of the why to help them hold the vision.

How do you show up as a leader? Are you all hype and no habit? Do you inspire your team, but fail to resource them to develop the habits necessary to get to their goals? What can you do to create a culture of positive habits that help the team move toward accomplishing the vision? Need help thinking into this? Contact me for a no cost to you thinking partner call. Lead Well.

Oct

2022

Fear as A Path to Growth

This is the time of year in the United States where people celebrate Halloween. This my least favorite holiday. Don’t get me wrong, I like the candy but there is nothing good for me by eating the candy.

What this holiday represents is the idea of fear. It celebrates fear and I want to suggest that the only thing to celebrate about fear is that it is our path to growth.

What do I mean by that? Allow me to reflect on the thoughts of some other people around this idea. I discussed this idea of fear in a past blog highlighting two perspectives on the idea, but this time I want to highlight how fear relates to growth.

The Ledge

Imagine standing at the edge of a cliff ready to jump off. Why am I standing there? Because I am tied to a rope and about to rappel down the side of a mountain. The nerves are high, and all types of thoughts go through my mind. Primarily “what if” scenarios. I must face my fear.

In his classic book Think and Grow Rich Napoleon Hill suggests:

“Fears are nothing more than states of mind.”

When looking over the ledge there is a legitimate concern that stepping off will end poorly, but what causes me to step off the ledge. I replace the state of fear with faith in the rope and those who hold it. The fear is real and what I focus on can make it decrease or increase.

As leaders we stand on the ledge of a choice to grow. Grow our team, grow our business, grow personally. The choice will take us into the fear zone which leads us to how we grow.

Stay Uncomfortable

In his book No Limits leadership expert John Maxwell discusses how to grow our capacity. He shares a story about an experience he read of a man’s month long training experience with a Navy Seal. At one point “SEAL” said to this man:

”If you don’t challenge yourself, you don’t know yourself.”

This is the state where as a leader you have to face the fear of the unknown and get uncomfortable. Kind of like stepping off the ledge even with all the “what ifs” flying through your mind. Only in this state of discomfort can we push the boundaries of ourselves and our team to determine what we can truly accomplish.

Be Wise

One last thought on fear. We don’t want to ignore it because it can warn us. We walk in a dark alley that does not feel right and we are afraid. This fear puts us on alert to impending danger so our senses are heightened.

We don’t want to be reckless as leaders. When looking over the ledge I was attached to a rope, but still was afraid. When looking at a new idea or opportunity, listen to the concerns your team mentions because there is a fine line between courageous and foolish you don’t want to cross.

Sit long enough with the fear to discern:

Is this fear based on something that could destroy everything we’ve accomplished?
Is this fear based on my selfish desire for comfort?
Is this fear that I need to be aware of as a risk when I take the next step?

Fear is normal and healthy when we do not allow ourselves to get trapped. What causes us to get stuck? Believing something that is not true is true.

Where are you? On the ledge, too comfortable, or maybe reckless and not being wise? Take time today to look at the opportunity you’ve been thinking about yet holding back. Ask the questions above, get advice from trusted advisors, and when it’s time . . . step off the ledge. Lead Well!

Oct

2022

Roadblocks to Momentum Part IV

I was sixteen years old in a Honda Accord. We stopped on a hill. This is typically no big deal, but right now it was.

I was driving a manual (stick shift) car. This was my mentor’s car and he explained to me how I needed to slowly let off the clutch while gently pressing on the gas at the same time. I start the process, then it happened.

The car started violently shaking back and forth like it was having a seizure. Internally I was thinking the car was going to blow up! My mentor remained calm, told me to push the clutch back in and push down on the gas. With a jerk, shimmy, and big lurch I then moved forward.

I don’t know if you have ever had that specific experience, but it reminds me of leading ourselves. The car was either going to go forward or backward even if it stalled. If I put the brake on, then I would be stuck going nowhere.

Leading ourselves can feel like driving a stick shift that has a clutch that is slipping. We don’t know what to do and get stuck out of ignorance or fear. What can we do when we sense this temptation to be complacent?

Set a Goal

I had this statement from my older brother going around in my head saying I wasn’t coordinated enough to drive a stick so I had a goal to prove I could accomplish this. Maybe you are stuck and feeling paralyzed on what to do because of a lack of vision. Take time to ask yourself these three questions:

What makes me excited?
What moves me to tears?
What brings me great joy?

These questions help you identify your passion. Once you have clarity on your passion ask what is one step that can move me in that direction? This will reveal your first goal. Continue asking this to determine the following goals.

Get in Motion

A goal is like revving the engine. Next you must put the car in gear. At this point you know your goal and need to move. Is there someone you need to talk to? Maybe you need to develop a new habit that will get you moving in the direction of your goal.

Take time to determine the first step and then do it immediately! As you move discover the next step and take it. Continue asking yourself what is the next best step to help me get to my goal? This is like putting the car in first, but if we stay there too long we overheat so we shift into second and continue climbing the hill.

Find Accountability

As I was learning to drive this stick shift, I had a person beside me who could teach me and correct me if I was heading in a destructive direction. To avoid the complacency trap, find someone or a group of people who know your goals and will challenge you when you are not moving toward them.

Each Friday I have a business accountability partner call with a friend. A consistent question for us on the call is what did you do this week and what are you doing next week? This forces me to think into how I’m moving the business forward on a weekly basis. When I’m stuck he encourages me and when I’m lazy he is honest with me. A little tough love helps us all move from complacency to consistent action.

Which of these three steps do you need to take? Are you stuck in any of these areas and need someone to come alongside you to help you get unstuck and regain clarity on where you are headed or where you are leading your team? Contact me for a powerful thinking partner session to help you think into your business and go from stuck to soaring. Lead Well.