Blog - Page 27 of 60 - Wheeler Coaching Systems

Dec

2020

Reflection and Planning for the New Year

I was listening to a friend and mentor of mine share his method of year end reflection and planning. I found it extremely helpful and wanted to share with you. Ray shared four “R’s” to use in looking back and planning for the future.

In each section I will provide the quadrant and then a few, but not all of the questions he suggests we ask ourselves. I hope you find this helpful.

Review

First, we review the past year. I have heard many ways this can be done. One person I know will look at his calendar and evaluate the use of his time. Using the calendar, if you or someone else keeps an accurate one for you, gives us an objective review to see trends in our life and the following questions Ray provides may help us in that review process:

What is life pushing up? – this may be a reoccurring theme you see from your life
What is life pushing out? – Things in your business or life are no longer needed or relevant
What is life trying to push me toward? – maybe there is a reoccurring opportunity

Remember

One of my mentors at the end of the year scrolls through his phone looking at all the pictures to remember what happened in the past year. This helps him reflect and celebrate what occurred. As we move out of review to remember here are some questions that may be helpful:

What is it that I need to celebrate?
Who do I need to honor?
Where do I need to breathe? – areas you need space and margin in your life

Release

Each year we have both good and bad experiences personally and professionally. We need to explore these and determine what we need to let go of. Maybe our calendar should be cleared of certain experiences or responsibilities. Possibly there is something we need to release emotionally. To help us determine what to release use these questions:

What thing do I need to release? – a physical thing
Who are the people I need to release? – relationships have a lifespan at times and if a relationship does not serve us, we need to let it go
What are the activities I need to release? – maybe some activities are not serving us well anymore
What commitments do I need to release? – look at what we need to say “no” to

Reset or Renew

This is the part where we are looking ahead. I remember playing my Nintendo Entertainment System as a kid and needing to press the reset button because of frustration. This is true for all of us. Especially after a year like 2020 we may have realized through forced shutdown that we need to set aside time to renew ourselves so we can lead ourselves and others from a healthy place. These are Ray’s questions that help us stay energized as we move ahead:

Is my focus in alignment with my purpose? – if you don’t know your purpose, get clarity there
What do I need to do to renew my energy physically, spiritually, and emotionally?
How do I need to renew my environment? – office, home

This can be a difficult, but necessary process. Maybe this helps you or you want to adjust it. If you need help thinking into your results then connect with me and let’s talk. Reflect on this year and move ahead to make next year even better. Lead Well.

Dec

2020

Holiday Self-Leadership Part III

Originally this series was based on a series of videos I did last year. For this final blog in the series I’m making an adjustment.

I was at the Christmas celebration with my wife’s side of the family. After our celebration time we reflected on how Christmas can feel less special and meaningful. All our kids are old enough that the magical feeling has greatly decreased. After talking ideas came to mind of how to lead and make Christmas less about getting and more about something else.

Engage with Others

As I reflected the next morning, I realized family gatherings personally become less meaningful because I fail to engage those around me. This specific experience I managed to get myself lost after visiting someone in my wife’s small town and was late . . . but that is a story for another day. When I finally arrived, I was in my own world and was not engaging well with people around me. We all have stress, worries and life happening . . . especially this year, but maybe if we take the time to ask questions, listen, and engage with those around us we will experience the joy of relationships and connecting.

Serve Others

While processing this struggle of maintaining the joy of the holidays I realized I need to step up my leadership. What do I mean? I wonder what it could look like if I encouraged my family and led the way to adopt a family and provided for their Christmas. Shift our Christmas from giving gifts to one another to serving a family in need. For this to be part of our family I need to step up and lead by planning, preparing, and implementing. Maybe this idea would be good to implement both in your home and your organization.

Focus on the Real Meaning

This part may be different for you than for me. For me the meaning of Christmas is the love God showed the world by coming as a child to ultimately give us hope and save us. Now, that may not be the real meaning for you as you. Maybe the real reason is family, or you have a different faith so it is different for you. Regardless of faith, a shared meaning of the holidays is they are a time to focus on others and giving. To focus on the real meaning, intentionally lead ourselves and others in ways that connect with and serve them over serving ourselves.

I realize the end of the year is stressful even without the holidays. How can you shift your focus slightly so you can enjoy the holiday season more this year? Share with me. Enjoy your holiday season and lead well.

Dec

2020

Holiday Self-Leadership Part II

Last week I shared ideas on how to lead ourselves well during the Holidays. I’m continuing this week and as I said this is based on a series of videos I created last year, but the world has changed since last Christmas.

I don’t know if you’re like me, but life can get really crazy during the holiday season. There’s already expectations at work and at home, but then we pile on the often-unrealistic holiday expectations. Maybe a pressure to buy lots of gifts or excessive commitments to be at multiple events even in a time when gatherings are limited the pressure has gotten more complex. What can we do to help us with these expectations?

Even in a limited gathering time like this we still all have a lot going on, but maybe one of these ideas will help you adjust your expectations and maintain perspective during this time.

Community

This is a unique year in that we are limiting how much we gather, but we still need community. Community is connection whether in person, on the phone, or via video. People in our community can help us maintain a proper perspective. How do we build that community whether in person or otherwise?

Ask questions and be fully present with the other person. We’ve all done it. We are on the video conference or phone call and we only half listen because we are busy doing something else. When we are in person we look present, but mentally may be elsewhere. We were built for human interaction. During the holiday season take time to connect and listen for what other people need to understand appropriate expectations.

Realistic Goals and Expectations

Life is much different this holiday season than it was a year ago. Considering that, have we modified our expectations? We may not be able to get that perfect gift . . . and the other person may be ok with that. Chances are they care more about us being fully present with us emotionally than receiving a present. If gifts are important to those in our community, how could we provide them in a way that creates less stress while showing great love to those individuals?

Serve

A third idea is getting out of our own world. I know during the holiday season our family tries to find unique ways to help other people. In the past, we’ve delivered gifts or food to families in need. Also, we have gone to a place in downtown Indianapolis to wrap gifts for a community gift shop. Each of these ideas are ways we get a fresh perspective and help us be certain we have realistic expectations.

These were three simple ideas on what we can do to help us adjust our expectations and maintain perspective. As leaders when we have proper perspective and expectations we will be in a place to help those we lead do the same. Which of these areas will you engage with this Holiday season? Let me know and lead well.

Dec

2020

Holiday Self-Leadership Part I

Last year I posted on Facebook asking people the greatest challenges they have over the holidays. I received multiple responses and over the next few weeks I’ll share some ideas I hope will help you in leading yourself during the holidays.

I originally talked about some of this in my Friday video last year, but a lot has changed in our world since I made that video. During the holidays in a non-pandemic year someone asked how to take time for themselves during the holidays. Allow me to suggest a few ideas on leading ourselves in three different areas during this time.

Physical Self-Leadership

In a normal holiday season, we get worn down but this compounds with the added stressors of staying at home and potentially virtual school. If we can’t lead ourselves well during the holidays, we’re not going to be able to give generously to those around us at work, at home, and in other areas. Leadership is influence and we can’t give what we do not have so we must take care of ourselves during the holiday.

What can we do to overcome this physical fatigue? Many of us get caught caring for others so much we forget to care for ourselves. One way is taking care of our physical well-being. During the lockdown period this year people took walks to exercise. This same idea can apply during the holidays. If you are like me, you have more treats during the holidays so taking ten minutes each day to do something active can help us with our physical well-being. This could be a walk, push-ups, yoga, stretching or some level of physical activity.

Mental Self-Leadership

The physical activity not only helps our physical well-being, but can also help our mental well-being. Combine the pressures of our present circumstances with the normal work, home, and holiday pressures and you can reach the point of exploding!

So what could we do? One idea is a breath prayer or thought. Take a moment to let the stress go either through a physical response such as a breath out or a phrase like “let it go” or “it will all work out” or if you’re a person of faith you’d say “somebody bigger than me is in control.” I don’t know what phrase works for you but determine a way to release that stress in a positive way to help your mental wellness.

Social Self-Leadership

When I first talked about this the context was a little different than today. Right now any time spent in direct interaction with others can be very welcome. During this time of year we may be reminded of a loss in our life. At times we are stressed because of interactions with those in our life we prefer not to be around. In our present reality there are some topics we avoid discussing because it can increase tension. With this social tension combined with extra tension from the realities of this past year, how do we lead ourselves in this area?

Community. Who are the safe community of people you can interact and be honest with during these times? They may be from a group you are involved in or activity you participate in or a close, trusted neighbor. Whoever it is connect with them or maybe you need time to escape alone to hide in a closet or bathroom just to recharge. Depending on your personal style find a way to stay fresh socially so you can connect with others in a meaningful way.

There it is. Three areas to grow our self-leadership during these unique holiday times. If you want to see the series of videos I made on this topic last year go here for this video and you will be able to find the others as well. Make this a great week and lead well.

Nov

2020

Learning from A Small Business Leader

We were sitting in the lobby outside of Holder Mattress in Carmel, IN. I was learning from the third-generation leader of this family owned business. A woman who had grown up around her family’s mattress factory in Kokomo, IN.

When she had volunteered seventeen years ago to take over the leadership of this struggling business from her Aunt and Uncle, she had many challenges on her hands. As a young, but determined, leader she refused to allow the business to close while she was leading. This determination paid off. Within a few short years of taking over a business that was being protected by bankruptcy at the time, she made decisions that quickly made it into the profitable family owned small business it has become.

During our time we discussed some of the principles that guided and continue to guide her leadership.

Build the Best

All industries have varying degrees of competition. Instead of focusing on the competition, Lauren learned from her grandfather the value of building the best. As a small company in a big industry that manufactures their own product they are able to control quality. When you focus on being the best you can be, then everything else takes care of itself.

In his book Wooden on Leadership, John Wooden and Steve Jamison state:

“When you start thinking about winning, you stop thinking about doing your job.”

This mindset of focusing on doing your best will help leaders build the best. We can’t control the competition or the market or other situations. Just like John Wooden focused on his team being the best they could be, find what you are best at and excel. This is a significant reason why Lauren was able to turn around the business when she took over.

Treat People Right

I have been reading leadership expert John Maxwell’s book Ethics 101 and he made the observation that the golden rule of treating others as you would want to be treated spans across all belief systems. This was the foundational guiding principle Lauren learned from her grandfather. Watching her grandfather build a small town, family owned business taught her to treat everyone like a neighbor.

When we treat all people right, we get positive results. If we treat others with respect and care they often will do the same. Leading in the retail business Lauren learned from her grandfather that sometimes letting a person leave, with respect and care, is treating them right because you may not have what a customer is looking for.

Put the Needs of Others Before Your Ego

Through an early experience with a customer Lauren learned the negative impact of her strong will and ego. She had a customer whose needs she did not think would be met by the product they purchased. Instead of discussing with them possible modifications and having an open conversation she decided to have her manufacturers make the modifications she thought would be helpful. . . . a few weeks later the customers returned dissatisfied.

She regularly shares with her team how she realized she needed to learn to listen to people well and above all be honest. We can easily think we know what is best for another person, but when we listen we are able to serve others and do what is best for them and not what we think is best.

After looking at these three principles, which of them do you need to grow in? Do you need help thinking into this? Contact me for a thirty-minute thinking partner session at no cost to you. Lead Well.

Nov

2020

Leadership and Gratitude

Each year about this time people visit family to eat turkey and enjoy time with one another. Sometimes these family gatherings for people are great experiences while for others they can be tense and awkward. What makes the difference?

Having gratitude.

Gratitude has been defined as “the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.” How can this mindset of gratitude help us as leaders specifically at work.

Helps Us Shift to There is a Way

Leading anything is full of challenge and adversity. We hit a roadblock that feels like a giant mountain in front of us we do not know how to get around. When we hit this what do we do?

At times we think “can I even do this?” We shift to a focus on all the reasons why this will NOT work therefore putting us in a scarcity mindset. There is another option.

Think “how can I do this?” With a mind full of thankfulness at the lessons learned up until now about both what does and does not work, we press ahead. This abundant mindset helps us focus on finding the way even though up until now we have not.

Helps us Empower Others

Leaders work with people and to empower others we must believe in them and their ability. Ken Blanchard et. al. developed the concept of Situational Leadership. In this four-phased model two of the phases in developing others require a high amount of support and encouragement.

Most people will not perform exactly the way we want when they first start and will require a lot of encouragement and gratitude for their effort and progress. Think of the leaders you have had. The ones you worked hardest for on some level expressed gratitude for your work. Gratitude creates an empowering environment which increases productivity and results.

Helps us Boost Team Morale

In their book Switch Chip and Dan Heath discuss the challenge of leading change. One aspect of their thinking involves discovering the “bright spots.” This is locating what is being done right and amplifying it. I would suggest these bright spots can more easily be found when we have gratitude.

As leaders we see the vision of where we want something to be and the result we get along the way often is not it. If you are like me, you tend to focus on all that needs to be improved and unfortunately this can lead down a path of criticism and lack of gratitude. Instead if we focus on the bright spots where things are going well and do more of that work the team morale will increase from gratitude for what they are accomplishing.

I did not even touch on this idea of gratitude in leading ourselves which you can learn about in a digital program I created here. My question for you is how can you develop gratitude as a leader and spread it to your team? Like any change this will take time and persistence, but the payoff will be profound. Keep leading, growing in gratitude, and empowering those around you. Lead Well.