Blog - Page 49 of 60 - Wheeler Coaching Systems

May

2018

Three Leadership Lessons from an Air Force Chief Master Sergeant

I was sitting in my office trying to cool off from mowing two lawns in ninety plus degree heat and my friend and fellow John Maxwell Team member Mike Lightner was sitting on his porch eating lunch in about sixty five degree temperatures in beautiful Alaska.

Mike served our country for thirty years in the Air Force. He joined as early as possible and rose through the ranks to become one of the top one percent of those enlisted in the Air Force by becoming Chief Master Sergeant. During his time in service he also had the opportunity to work at the Pentagon. Since retiring he formed a business called Dare2Dream Leadership Development where he helps develop leaders. My reason for talking with him on this day was to learn from his military experience three leadership principles he found essential to success.

As we started the conversation I was slightly embarrassed that I had not read the book he wrote on what he was going to share with me, but he was gracious to me since we have been friends for a little while. The following three principles are what he found through his years in the military service to be foundational to effective leadership.

Boldness – Many times in organizations, teams, or other groups we would rather blend in and not stand out, but Lightner suggests as leaders we must stand out above everybody else and not be afraid to stand up for what we believe. Often this will mean taking risks when others will not. What enables a leader to be bold is the conviction that he or she knows what is going to be done is right. This confidence gives leaders boldness.
Strength – When he said this I had to get clarity on how this was different from leading bold and Lightner helped me understand being strong is the ability to take a position and stand by it. Often a leader may need to make a decision quick with less than the ideal amount of information and this strength helps him or her stand by the decision as well as humility. A strong leader will make a decision, monitor the decision, and when necessary admit a mistake in the decision-making process and change. This humility and willingness to change prevents analysis paralysis which in the military can cost lives.
Lead Well – I was confused on this until Mike explained this is remembering that every decision you make impacts people. For example, if an organization cuts the training of the people within the organization to reduce cost and then later cuts people the ultimate cost is a smaller, less trained workforce that ultimately leads to poorer quality and results. At the core of this principle is the question: how is this going to affect the people?

Mike understands leadership and the need to make effective, courageous decisions in a decisive manner and so do you, but maybe you need to grow in one of these areas. How bold are you being? Do you stand by your decisions? Do you consider the impact of your decisions on people? Maybe you need help thinking into your leadership results like both Mike and I help people do. Pick one of the three of these and lead like a soldier this week at work and at home. And for those of you who have served and continue to serve our country . . . THANK YOU!

May

2018

How My Big Mouth Taught Me the Importance Of Specific Leadership Skills

Note: This first appeared here as a part of The John Maxwell Team Leading Edge Blog

“If you show people how much you care and ask questions in a nonthreatening way, you’ll be amazed by how much they’ll tell you.” John C. Maxwell Becoming a Person of Influence

Confession: I am a very opinionated person. I have an amazing wife who has helped me learn not to be as much of a fool by always sharing my opinions. Because I tend to share my opinions freely it can get me in a bit of trouble from time to time.

As a coach with a sports team I once had a situation where one of the players was absent from a practice session. I did not know whether or not they were excused and out of frustration I made the comment that this individual seems to miss a lot. I thought I was sharing an innocent observation, but in reality I created an unnecessary problem because my comment unintentionally cast doubt about the player’s commitment.

About a week later I met with another leader connected to this team and we talked about the situation. In reality I did little talking. My job was to listen and understand the situation from the other leader’s perspective and together we move forward. I wanted that leader to know I desired to assist in helping the team reach its ultimate goals and not create any problems to make the goals more difficult to accomplish. I apologized where appropriate and asked questions so I could understand how to prevent a similar future situation.

As I reflected on this situation a few leadership lessons arose. These lessons I would suggest are also skills we all can develop to become better leaders.

Think before speaking – I know this is not earth shattering and as a child if you are like me you may have heard this thousands of times. Had I paused and thought before I shared my opinion I probably would have saved myself a week worth of stress.

Maybe the following acrostic will help you as it has helped me. I am not sure where I first heard it but recently I have seen it regularly on the back of a shirt.

T – Is it True?

H – Is it Helpful?

I – Is it Inspiring?

N – Is it Necessary?

K – Is it Kind?

Listen don’t just hear – I have been married a little while and I realize sometimes I am great at hearing which some would call “selective listening.” I hear what I want, but may not truly absorb what is being said. From this situation I knew I had to listen to the team’s leader and make sure that leader knew I understood what was being said. I could go more in depth on levels of listening, but that will have to be saved for another time.
Ask Good Questions – In order to listen well and clearly understand the other leader’s perspective, I had to ask good questions and gain great clarity. A great leader listens more than he or she speaks. A leader will take time to figure out the right questions to ask and then listen and learn before making an actionable decision.
Change – If I truly listened in my conversation and learned what behavior or action needed attention then I will modify it. This is the most difficult skill at times especially if the change is not your idea. Change or adaptability, though is how we grow and become more effective leaders.

So how do you develop these skills? First, take John’s advice from the quote at the beginning and take time to let people know you care and ask questions. Next, be humble enough to be aware of the need to grow. After that, take the first step that you need to improve. Just like any other skill it will take time for you and me, but in the end our influence and leadership will grow tremendously.

May

2018

Three Leadership Principles From Mom

The evil eye. That was what my brother and I called it in our house. It was “the look” we got from mom when we knew we had done something wrong. In some cases we got that look when we were about to get something wrong. The look was so intimidating it brought nightmares at times.

The calm voice. That was the person we saw when we were in over our heads with frustration and just needed to vent. Little did I realize years ago what a great leader my mom was, but as I look back I see a few principles we can all learn about leadership from my mom, and who knows, maybe your mom as well.

Love – This is where all good leadership starts. A good leader cares about those he or she leads. This is demonstrated in various ways. Psychologist Gary Chapman is known for five ways people usually demonstrate love: Acts of Service, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving gifts, and Physical Touch. An entire post could be written about these five love languages especially since Chapman has written multiple books on the topic. All of these can be applied in our leadership at work or at home. Mom always knew which I needed, and as a leader when we can implement Chapman’s ideas with those we lead so they will feel value, appreciation and perform at a much higher level.
Firm and Clear Boundaries – Remember I told you about the “evil eye”? That was mom’s quick way of setting a boundary for us ornery boys. As leaders those we lead need to know what the expectations are and the lines they cannot cross. When we were kids we had a playground at school and often it had a fence. We knew we could go anywhere inside the fence and have freedom to use our skills and abilities freely. Outside the fence we would endanger ourselves. As leaders we set boundaries that will bring clarity to what we want accomplished. One caution, make sure the boundaries do not stifle the creativity of those you lead. A fine line exists between healthy boundaries and micromanagement . . . but that discussion is for another day.
Consistency – In my home, mom was always there. She demonstrated the labor of love in making our lunches for school every day. She had breakfast prepared for us in the morning and she was there to listen to us after we got home from school or as she drove us home from our extra-curricular activities. All of this demonstrated consistency. We knew she was there and could count on her. As leaders when we are consistent in our availability, communication, responses to challenges and more, those we lead have confidence in us and trust us which creates a healthier work environment.

What about you? As a leader at work and home which of these areas do you need to improve on? Pick one of these and take one step further in your growth as a leader at work and home. Maybe there is another principle you would draw from your mom’s leadership, share it in the comments section below. In the meantime lead well at work and home.

May

2018

Climbing and Leadership

I’m sitting on a bench on a cloudy day in the woods in Southern Indiana as I watch my oldest son seeking to reach the top of a climbing wall for the first time. We are at a Father/Son camp experience and he has tried to climb this wall multiple times over the years. The last time he did it with me present a wasp intervened and stung his leg. On this particular day a loose rock prevented him from reaching the goal as it caused him to slip.

He looks down when he is about two-thirds of the way up and yells, “Do I get some red juice if I make it?”

I don’t answer because I want him intrinsically motivated to accomplish his goal.

He continues to climb and I help him to see what he can’t see such as where to place his feet because a rock may be between his legs and he is unaware. He takes each step up and with great care reaches up and touches the top of the wall looking down while I take pictures.

As I reflected on that climb I saw three key principles that apply to leadership. Leadership is like climbing up a wall. Whether at home or work the following three principles from his climb apply to our leadership.

Hold Your Vision – My son had a desire to reach the top, now the desire for another glass of juice may have helped him persist, but the desire kept him climbing. With every step he got closer and as long as he held in his sight the ultimate goal he was going to get there. As leaders we must have clear vision. We must know where we are going and keep that ultimate vision in front of us whether that is to meet a business benchmark, personal goal, or help a child reach a personal benchmark they may not even be aware they have.
Listen to the Right Voice – We all have thoughts that come into our minds. Which ones do we allow to stay? Is it the voice like mine that continually encouraged my son that he could do it or are we tuning into the voice that instills doubt and fear? The thoughts we allow to remain in our minds impact our leadership. What we feed our minds from the outside can either help or hinder us from fulfilling the vision.
One Step At a Time – Climbing is never easy. Unless you have super powers it will always require one step at a time. As my son struggled up the wall there were times he had to pause and consider the next best move which worked sometimes and at times did not. As leaders we need the big picture, but the implementation takes one step at a time.

What is the leadership climb you are on right now? Do you have someone helping you see the next move to reach your vision? Are you listening to the right voice? Anything worth having will be an uphill climb. Who do you have encouraging you and coaching you along the way? Whatever the vision whether at work or home continue to take one step at a time and like my son you will reach the top, look down, and smile . . . . then get ready to climb again. Lead well at work and home today and let me know any way I can help you.

Apr

2018

Developing Future Leaders

“Do you think you are a leader?” I ask as I stand in front of a classroom of fourteen to eighteen year olds. A couple hands shoot up, a few are timidly raised because they are not sure, but many are left down and their eyes drop.

“Do any of you interact with someone?” All hands go up and those that don’t we call the local funeral home to haul them off because they must be dead. I continue to explain to these young men and women that leadership is influence and they are leaders even if only to one person. They continually influence others.

Over the last month I had the opportunity to help students see that they can be leaders as part of The John Maxwell Team Global Youth Initiative. Over the course of the month I was able to share lead

ership principles with around 700 students.

I was able to share with them a simple personality test that helped them understand themselves and those around them to see the strengths they have to add value to others.

I shared principles that would help improve their self-esteem and understand some of their natural gifting.

I was able to share with some of them Nick Vujicic’s five steps to success.

Some of them experienced an amazing interactive game called the Leadership Game where they were built up and empowered by their peers and grew in their understanding of practical leadership actions they need to grow in.

What an opportunity to do all that! Now, how does this matters for you? Some of the principles and ideas I shared with them also apply to us.

Our image of ourselves – A couple groups of students learned that at the foundation of being an effective leader one has to have the correct image of themselves. What is the image we are holding of ourselves? Do we believe we have what we need to be effective leading in the role we hold at work or the role we fulfill at home? It may look different than when we were teenagers, but we still have to pay attention to our self-talk to assure we are reinforcing truth and not lies about who we are and what we can do.
Our strengths and gifts – One leadership lesson I taught some of these students helped them identify their natural gifts and understand their personality. When we understand ourselves and what comes more natural to us we can lead in our strengths and have others use their strengths where we are weak to build a stronger and more effective team.
Our purpose – Vision provides clarity and as leaders when our purpose is clear we are able to more effectively point those we lead toward the goal. What is the ultimate purpose of the team, organization, family, etc. you are leading? That clarity will inform and enable more effective decision making.

No matter where we lead, we need to build the next generation of leaders. Those may be leaders entering their first job in your organization or your own children. What purpose are you giving that next generation of leaders? Just as I was able to help these students understand their purpose, value, and gifts wherever you work you can do the same. Continue to lead well at work and at home empowering the next generation.

Apr

2018

Four Qualities of Championship Team Builders

Have you wondered how a sport coach becomes an effective leader and builds unified championship caliber teams? I have been around coaches for many years and involved in the sports world on some level. I have seen coaches who demonstrate this ability with great ease and are consistently successful. I have also seen coaches who struggle with this.

I have seen talented teams do poorly and average to above average teams succeed beyond what anyone would have imagined. Without a doubt in order to have success there has to be a certain level of talent or skill which applies in all areas of life. You won’t have a high performing salesperson if they are not good at working with people or get many customers for a service oriented business like plumbing if your plumbers are not knowledgeable.

How do these successful leaders build unified teams? I have been reading a book that answers that question through looking at the lives of nine high level sport coaches. In his book Getting to Us Seth Davis shares the stories of the lives of coaches such as Coach K, Coach Urban Meyer, Coach Izzo from Michigan State and others. Each of these coaches demonstrate what he calls a PEAK profile to develop unified teams.

Persistence – in the classic book Think and Grow Rich Napoleon Hill spends an entire chapter discussing the importance of persistence in success in any area of life. When an individual has persistence combined with a burning desire to accomplish their dream they can attain great accomplishments.

Empathy – one individual who brought this concept to the front of our minds was Daniel Goleman in his books on Emotional Intelligence. This is the ability for us to not only understand our own feelings, but also the feelings of the person we are relating to. Davis states it as “feeling whatever that person is feeling.”¹

Authenticity – the ability to be appropriately genuine and honest with those we lead helps increase trust and therefore builds greater cohesion among the team. The individual leader’s style may vary because some are intense while others are more relaxed in their style. No matter the leader’s style, if they are consistent, honest, and transparent in the right ways this will demonstrate authenticity.

Knowledge – no one follows a leader who does not know what they are doing . . . at least not for long. Davis reminds us that even if the doctor is really empathetic, persistent, and authentic if they do not know what they are doing there is no way we will let them operate on us. Without an appropriate level of knowledge leaders will not be able to maintain the credibility that will keep the team unified.

When you look at the four principles in Davis’ PEAK profile where do you need to grow? Do you easily give up as the climb gets challenging? Do you take time to understand and feel what those you lead feel? That may seem unproductive in the short term, but I wonder if the return is exponential in the long term. Are you authentic with your team members and continually growing in your expertise of the industry you are in whether through formal or informal education? At times I have found people need a coach to help them think into this process so they can see what they may not have seen on their own similar to what these sport coaches do for their athletes. Whatever you need to grow in, take the first step so you can become a better leader both at work and home.

Davis, Seth. Getting to Us. New York: Penguin House, 2018 p.3.