Blog - Page 52 of 60 - Wheeler Coaching Systems

Jan

2018

The Pain of A Lack of Awareness

I had the opportunity to give my oldest son a unique experience. At this point in his life he wants to be a pilot so I had a friend who provided an experience for us in a four seater plane.

As we were getting in the plane everyone had boarded the plane and I was the last one to get on. I rounded the corner to get into the plane and my head smacked into the wing of the plane since they are not very far off the ground as you can see in the picture of one above. After trying not to shout an expletive and letting the stars clear I quietly got in my seat in the rear of the plane with no one else knowing anything happened.

As I sat in my seat watching my son experience flying a plane I was pondering how often in my life I am blindsided just like I was by that wing. Life happens and at times the obvious catches me quite off guard just as that wing had.

You see, I knew the wing was there, but maybe I just needed a simple reminder to duck (which I had done on the other side by the way) to avoid an unnecessary thump.

What does all this have to do with leadership?

Awareness – according to the “google” dictionary is “knowledge or perception of a situation or a fact”

What do leaders need to be aware of as they lead?

People – are there people whom you work alongside and/or lead who blindside you because of inadequate communication? Do you unintentionally blindside others for the same reason? Who are the key influencers that help move your organization or team forward? Do you need to help them increase their awareness of the influence they have or can have within the organization? Are your people in the right seat on the bus as leadership expert Jim Collins describes in his book Good to Great?

Processes – are there systems within your organization, department, or team that slow down effectiveness? Do you have processes that help work flow smoothly and effectively? Are you aware of the processes that exist within your organization either organically or intentionally? What processes do you need to create or evaluate? Do you need to educate others on processes that will improve work flow and overall organization, group, department, or team effectiveness?

Situation – author Dennis N. T. Perkins in his book Leading at the Edge says “instill optimism and self-confidence, but stay grounded in reality.” Leaders are continually looking ahead to see where the group can go and tend to be quite optimistic, but are you aware of reality still? You may want to engage in a high cost project, but you don’t want to be hit upside the head because you do not have the appropriate cash flow to support the venture. Leaders must see both the opportunity and the reality and that requires awareness.

I look at this limited list and think these three items are overwhelming and there is definitely more to be aware of as a leader. I can’t do this type of thinking alone . . . I need help . . . someone who will ask me questions and help me think into my situation. Maybe you feel the same. If so, contact me and let’s have a free 30 minute coaching session to see how I can help you lead yourself and others better. Increase your awareness or you may have more than just a bump on your head like I received from the airplane wing.

Jan

2018

New Year . . . New You

One of my good habits is that I exercise in the morning every week day. In all truth I exercise to help my eating addiction. If I were really disciplined I’d quit eating sweets which are my downfall. Anyway . . . at the beginning of every year I find it very entertaining the huge influx in the local health clubs.

This is great for businesses, but by February the gyms that were overflowing have now returned to a normal state. Part of me chuckles and part of me is saddened by this reality. I chuckle at the consistency of this occurrence, but I am saddened by the reality this is a snapshot of many of our lives.

As I said I have a weakness for sweets. Pretty much anything with chocolate or sugar in general gets me. I know these are terrible for me, but they taste so goooood. I want to change the habit and decrease my amount of sugar consumption, but then I hit the “change wall.”

The “change wall” is that barrier we hit and are terrified to go through because we don’t know what life will be like on the other side. We have two choices when faced with the need to change:

Embrace – Will we see the change as an opportunity to grow and develop into a better version of ourselves?
Resist – Will we just stay comfortable and remain the same therefore not reaching our full potential?

This idea of change has been highlighted in books such as Who Moved My Cheese or Our Iceberg Is Melting which are both parables on how to lead or handle change. These can help us with the nuances of leading others through change and our personal response to change, but it all comes down to the two options above.

As we enter into a new year maybe these two ideas will help you have more success this year in implementing positive changes than you did last year.

Choose the right attitude. Whether we embrace or resist change is a choice we make that starts in our mind with our attitude. Staying the same feels easier, but in the end will we reach our full potential? Are we limiting our personal capacity because of our mindset? Courageously, with faith, take the first step into the change that will help you become who you were meant to be.
Develop the right habit. As we move in the direction of the correct mindset we have to develop a habit. The individuals that succeed in their resolution to exercise put it on their schedule and commit to the habit of doing the exercise regularly as a consistent habit. At first it may just be one day a week, but over time the habit grows until it becomes routine.

Change is hard. Why do people hire personal trainers in the beginning? They need accountability and the investment provides that accountability and helps with their attitude and habits. Maybe there is something in your life and you need to break through your “change wall”, but that will require someone else to help you think into the changes you need to make either personally or professionally with your business/work. If that describes you, contact me and let’s have a complimentary coaching session to see if I can help you grow into the best leader you can be at work and home this year. Break through the wall this year and reach your capacity!

Dec

2017

What Can the Christmas Story Teach About Leadership?

Christmas is a holiday here in the states that I have mixed emotions about. On one level I love it especially because of the meaning behind it which we will explore a little more in a moment. I love the time with family and watching my children get excited. I enjoy the overall intended spirit of kindness, generosity and caring. In all honesty though I do get a bit cynical because of the consumerism that arises and the challenges that come with that aspect.

What does this holiday teach us about leadership? In this brief post I cannot go into all the great lessons we can learn, but I want to look at the Christmas story and highlight a few leadership lessons we can learn.

Whether you believe the Biblical account to be truth or a story we can all gain from what we see in the account of the birth of Jesus Christ. As I look at this account I see a courageous leader and a cowardly leader. Two men who do not know each other demonstrate the two extremes of courage.

Joseph. If you are not familiar with the story he is engaged to be married to Mary, but then finds out his wife is pregnant. As you can imagine this is quite disturbing to learn because it looks like he was with her before marriage which would bring extreme shame to him and his family. The reality was actually different than what people thought.

In the Bible in Matthew 1:18-21 it says Joseph wanted to do the right thing so he was thinking he would quietly divorce Mary, but God had a different idea. He said (this is my translation) “Um, Joe, no. This baby came from the Holy Spirit. You will have a son and name him Jesus.”

So what does this have to do with leadership? As a leader in an organization or your family you may have to make intuitive decisions. These are decisions based on a gut instinct which may have some factual information backing them, but also require courage. This was exactly what Joseph had to do. Joseph had to put his faith into action and courageously lead. Instead of leaving he had to have the courage to stay and love his new wife and raise this child.

King Herod. Now there was another man during this same time whose leadership influence was much broader than Joseph the carpenter. Herod was the Roman ruler over Judea at the time which we now know as a part of Israel. He learned a story that out of Bethlehem would come a ruler over the people of Israel. When the Magi informed him this king was about to be born his authority was threatened and he was afraid so he asked the Magi let him know of the child’s exact location when they returned.

Now the Magi had a sense of Herod’s intention to murder the child so they did not return. In Matthew 2:16 we learn that after he realized the Magi were not going to tell him he “was furious, and he gave orders to kill all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity who were two years old and under.” This response demonstrates the exact opposite of Joseph.

Herod heard something he did not want to hear and in his fear he acted cowardly instead of courageously. As a leader he could have said I will meet the family of this new “king” and develop a relationship and we can rule together. This response would take both courage and humility because when a new leader arises people want to protect their territory. But Herod tried to remove this threat through violent means.

I know it feels easier for me to protect my territory when my leadership is threatened and I am scared to enter into the unknown and trust like Joseph did. What kind of leader are you when you get news that you may not want to hear? Do you courageously, with faith, move in the direction you think you should go? Are you like Herod and stubbornly, with fear, resist this news and try to keep everything from changing by manipulating the situation? Sometimes you need someone to come alongside you to help you in the process . . . but I will talk about that next time. May you lead courageously at home and work this holiday season.

Dec

2017

Leading with Boundaries

My wife and I have three young energetic boys running around the house and neighborhood. Just like you, I have multiple people and responsibilities simultaneously pulling at me. As I think of when my children were real young I think about playgrounds. Some playgrounds were relaxing while others were not. What was the difference?

Where we live there is one playground/park that was about three stories tall and had long slides and lots to climb on. Not only that, but there was a creek nearby that at times got quite high and a large grassy field that bumped up next to a busy road. When the boys were early elementary age and younger this area stressed me out and I was constantly looking around and trying to know where the boys were. On the other hand, when I went to the boys’ elementary school with them there was a playground with a fence around it and I could sit on a bench and watch them play or push them on a swing. The latter was the relaxing one, or at least less stressful, because it had boundaries the boys could not escape.

As I think of the playground or park illustration it reminds me of a need we have in our lives whether we want to admit it or not. We have a certain amount we can handle and as leaders when we provide expectations that helps set the boundaries. Dr. Henry Cloud and John Townsend state in their book Boundaries:

“You need to realize how much time and energy you have, and manage your work accordingly. Know what you can do and when you can do it, and say no to everything else. Learn to know your limits and enforce them.”

If you lead a team or organization then clearly established boundaries will help those you lead perform at a higher level. With the playground a child knows they can go and explore and use all their creativity anywhere on the playground, but they must not go past the fence because it exists for their safety. As a caveat I am not talking about times we need to go beyond the boundaries of comfort in order to grow. I am referring to the boundaries that clarify our expectations and individual limits.

When leading a team, if they know clearly what outcome is expected a healthy leader who does not feel the need to micromanage will allow individuals to use their personal strengths and creativity to decide the best process to accomplish the goal. Similar to a teacher on a school playground, the leader may monitor and check in to see if the team needs any assistance during the process, but not tell them every step. The leader has a responsibility to understand whether the expectations are reasonable based on available time and the scope of work needed.

How are you at establishing boundaries? Do you have clarity on what you expect of those you lead? If not, what do you need to do in order to gain that clarity? Do you need to intentionally carve out time for those areas of your life you have been neglecting such as your health or family relationships? Take time and reflect on these to become a better leader today.

Dec

2017

Money and Leadership?

Have you ever been at the store and seen that great deal you just “had to have”? Being that the Holiday marketing is in full swing as I write this surely we have all experienced this lately. Maybe it was a great outfit or maybe it was a shiny new electronic item you’ve been thinking about. At work or in your business maybe it was some new software that was going to make you more effective and efficient. Yeah, it may be a little more than you want, but it will be a business expense so that means you are investing in the business and will get a return.

None of these are bad . . . if we have the cash flow, but whether in our personal or professional financial dealings, three questions may help us to make wise decisions with our resources. Years ago these nifty little plastic items were made which I am sure you are quite familiar with: credit cards. When I was about 18 I had a friend who said something like “these things are awesome, it is like having money without really having it.” Although I still keep in touch with that friend I am not certain whether he created a debt problem for himself or not. A tip I probably should have advised him of back then: If you can’t pay it off when the bill comes, don’t buy it.

What are the three questions you may be asking:

Is this something I need? – Whatever the deal we are looking at, is it something we need? If our car is broken down with hundreds of thousands of miles on it and we need it for work, then the answer is yes. Now, maybe our car has some minor cosmetic problems that ultimately will amount to less than a thousand dollars for the year. Do we really need that work done?
Is this something I want? – Something I want may be a new organizing system for my garage which will help me be more efficient and even help me eliminate clutter and be more effective. Do I need it? Not really, but it will help our overall family effectiveness because we won’t have to hunt through the garage for items, but do we have the cash flow for this? If the answer to that question is no, then I need to wait.
Is this something I simply desire? – Years ago one of our electronic devices broke which we used to watch movies. This was connected to an entire surround sound system. I could not replace the individual device, I had to replace the entire system. Well, I decided it was time for a major upgrade and bought individual components to improve the overall system. This was NOT a need. This was a want, but ultimately it was a desire . . . something I could easily live without. So how did I pay for it . . . with my saved up birthday and Christmas money so it did not impact our family budget, just my personal savings of multiple years.

As you look at that purchase, before opening your wallet ask: do I need this? Do I want this? Is this simply a desire I can live without and the money would be spent better elsewhere? Spending more at the need and want level and staying within our limits will help maintain the financial balance we need to lower stress levels both at work and home. As we are able to keep this stress to a minimum this helps us think better by freeing our creativity and enabling us to lead well. What adjustment do you need to make in this area so you can lead better in other areas?

Dec

2017

Do You Feel Stuck?

A while ago I read a book by leadership expert John Maxwell called Intentional Living. This book discusses how to live purposefully and not simply run through your life aimlessly. It seems to me that at each decade of life a new question arises that causes me to think about what really matters. I recently hit one of those decades.

During this time I have asked myself if I am living as intentionally as possible. I have not spent these first decades of my life pursuing money and fame, but have sought to develop leaders particularly among the next generation, but can I be more intentional in what I do? As I read this book I came across a section that discussed how to find your why. When we know our why in life it makes the “what” of our life much more enjoyable.

John provides three clues to understand your why:

What do you cry about? Does a certain cause or injustice bring you to tears or are tears caused by a specific pain in your life?
What do you sing about? Is there something in your life that brings great inner joy such as helping others achieve success?
What do you dream about? If money were not a concern, what is it that you dream of accomplishing? Is it something so big you know you can’t do it alone? If you can do it alone, maybe the dream is not big enough.

Maybe you know these answers and you are in your passion zone, but still feel stuck in a rut. What can you do? Here are a few ideas:

Make a change and try a completely new job or role. Maybe your time where you are is up and you need a new challenge somewhere else if there is not an opportunity where you are. (Now, this does NOT apply at home just so you know)
Shift your mindset. Maybe you’ve had a desire to continually be getting and you are at a spot where you need to be giving more to others. Giving of your wisdom, giving of your time, giving a listening ear all may create a situation where you end up getting out of your rut.
Try to be a rookie at something. Why do we like getting a new _________ ? On one level this is because we are invigorated by the challenge of understanding and learning something new, but as we become experienced we can become bored. What is something you can approach like a rookie? Maybe a new skill, experience, or taking an appropriate personal or professional risk that will stretch you and make you grow.
Get objective help. At times we can benefit from someone who will help us think into our business, leadership, and life. An effective coach will help you do that because they will help you think into your results by asking questions.

This summer I had to help someone get their car out of the mud because they were in a rut with their tires spinning. Three other men and I gave the driver a push and after spraying mud all over us she was on her way. If you are stuck in a rut either personally or professionally hopefully this gives you a push to get out. It probably won’t be clean or easy, but it will be much better than staying stuck in the mud. Take the first step to lead yourself well in this so you will lead others better.