I have the opportunity to sit across from many leaders. One particular day I was facilitating a leadership experience activity where the leaders would discuss various questions. One of the questions addressed the issue of empowerment.
I asked these leaders to raise their hands if it was hard for them to equip others, and over half raised their hands. I asked why, and most said it took too much time. It is quicker for them to do it.
As I dig into this idea individually with leaders, I find a tension exists. They want responsibilities off their plate but also want it done right. Craig Groeschel discussed the tension of empowering and controlling in his leadership podcast.1 What do we do about this tension? How do we navigate it?
Why Leaders Control
In his book The Control Freak, Les Parrott explores why leaders meddle and try to control. He suggests this is rooted in anxiety. The fear that they may lose it all.2 An unhealthy leader tries to clone him or herself and, in reality, develops a team of followers who do tasks and take orders. This fear compels them to control in an unhealthy way.
In a previous blog, I mentioned how Ed Catmul of Pixar, in his book Creativity Inc discusses this idea of control in light of the ability to trust. He says:
“Fear and trust are powerful forces, and while they are not opposites, exactly, trust is the best tool for driving out fear.”
The fear of losing money, power, results, etc., as leaders, can compel us to reach for more control. A leader must move from fear to trust to empower those they lead. Can this drive for control be helpful for a leader?
Helpful Control
Leadership expert John Maxwell often emphasizes that a leader “sees more before.” This is a practical outworking of vision. Leaders see what others do not. Because of this perspective, they may have certain expectations. These expectations help preserve culture.
In his book, The Advantage, Patrick Lencioni provides four disciplines for organizational health. One of those disciplines is creating clarity.3 Clarity in mission, vision, values, and process procedures are all part of this healthy culture. This clarity is the healthy control a leader brings to a team.
Sports demonstrates another area of helpful control: the scoreboard. In his book The 17 Indisputable Laws of Teamwork, John Maxwell describes the Law of the Scoreboard, which helps the team know where it stands.4 Leaders are creating a healthy control method when they have a scoreboard. McChesney, Covey, and Huling suggest a compelling scoreboard is the third of four disciplines for execution in their book.5
This scoreboard helps clarify what is really important for the team to execute on and get results. It may feel controlling, but it clarifies where the organization stands and gives more purpose and direction.
Empower or Dump
We have established some reasons why people control and what healthy control can look like, but what about this idea of empowering? I have seen leaders who hand off a task to a team member and think they have empowered them. The team members look stunned and confused, wondering what they are supposed to do. This is an example of dumping a task that Groeschel suggests does not empower.
When we empower, we give people the authority to create and build something. For example, if I ask someone to fix my roof, but I give them no tools, they lack power. If I give them tools and they have the freedom to fix the roof the best way they know based on their expertise, then they are empowered. They will learn, grow, and even be able to teach others how to think about repairing a roof. If I tell them exactly how to do it, I’ve only dumped a task, and they will become good at the task but not necessarily learn how to think and problem-solve like a leader.
When we dump on those we lead and do not resource nor provide clear expectations, they may feel controlled. Remember a time you did a task, and someone came back and told you it was wrong, but you had no clear explanation of expectations at the beginning? This only sets you up to feel controlled and frustrated. Laying out expectations when we empower is a healthy control in our leadership.
Control or Boundaries
Fences are good. Think of a playground. Years ago, a study showed that kids at a playground with a fence feel free to play anywhere within the fence. Without the fence, they huddle near the teacher.6 Now, let’s imagine another scenario where they were shocked every time someone got near the fence. What is the difference between these two scenarios, and what does it have to do with control in our leadership?
The first scenario is a healthy boundary. Similar to when you provide clear expectations in delegation. If people know the expected outcome and are given the freedom to get there in the way they see works best, they don’t feel controlled. This is a boundary and a clear expectation that limits the project in healthy ways and provides focus. This is healthy control by the leader.
On the other hand, if, as the leader, you hover over your people and try to micromanage every step of the journey, then people feel controlled. They feel as if you are ready to zap them like the fence if they mess up. This type of control from a leader is unhealthy and will create a culture of fear.
So where do you fall in this tension as a leader? If you were to rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 5, with five being not controlling at all to the point of no boundaries and one being ready to zap people at any moment, where would you rank yourself? Like many leadership tensions, the best place to be is in the middle. We will lean toward one side over the other but aim to walk the tense tightrope balancing empowerment with control.
Need help thinking about where you fall on this? E-mail me at randy@wheelercoachingsystems.com, and let’s talk about how I can help you think into your leadership so you can lead from a healthier place. If you found this helpful, share it with others. Lead Well.
© 2023 Wheeler Coaching Systems, All Rights Reserved
- Craig Groeschel Leadership Podcast. Episode 114, “Lead Like It Matters Part I.” August 4, 2022.
- Parrott, Les. The Control Freak: Coping with Those Around You. Taming the One Within. Tyndale House, Wheaton, 2000.
- Lencioni, Patrick. The Advantage. Jossey-Bass, San Francisco, 2012.
- Maxwell, John. The 17 Indisputable Laws of Teamwork. Thomas Nelson, Nashville, 2001.
- McChesney, Chris, Covey, Sean, Huling, Jim. The 4 Disciplines of Execution. Free Press, NY, 2012.
- https://www.asla.org/awards/2006/studentawards/282.html retrieved 7/9/23
