Leadership

Aug

2021

Leadership Lessons from Braveheart – Part II

Nearly every year I watch the movie Braveheart. This year was a little different. I watched it with my three sons for the first time. After watching it last year I shared a blog on three leadership lessons I saw in the movie which you can read here.

This year was no different. As I watched the movie for yet another time, I saw leadership lessons from the life of William Wallace that I hadn’t quite noticed before.

Passion

My favorite scene in the movie is before the battle of Stirling. Scottish clans are lined up ready for battle. As the English army lines up their courage falters and they start to leave. As they begin to leave, in rides William Wallace and inspires them with vision and passion to call them to fight. His final words before provoking a fight are:

“They can take our lives, but they will never take our freedom.”

As leaders we must have passion for what we are leading. As the leader we most likely care more than anyone else and think about it more than others. How do we transfer this same passion? We must be able to help people see more as we do. One way that is accomplished it genuine belief and clear communication of the vision that people can feel from us.

Wisdom

William Wallace is watching as his dad and older brother go off to fight the English. Before leaving young Wallace is sitting on his dad’s horse eager to go with him. As his dad pulls him down from the horse William says he can fight. After affirming his fighting ability he says:

“I know you can fight, but it’s our wits that make us men.”

His dad is killed and his Uncle Argyle raises him. Wallace who was eager to learn how to fight was first taught how to use his mind. He returns and has the wisdom to know when to fight and when to wait. Through time, knowledge, and experience leaders gain wisdom. Wallace was smart, but he knew how to apply that intelligence in practical ways to help Scotland win key battles.

People

Two main groups of Scottish existed: commoners and nobles. Wallace was one of the former. Though he was knighted and possibly tempted with lands and money, he would not take it. As his fame and success on the battlefield grew the nobles wanted him collaborate more closely with them. He refused to enter this quest for titles, land, and power. When asked to work with them he challenges the nobles stating:

“Your position exists to provide these people with freedom.”

Wallace had the hearts of the people. His passion was contagious because he lived out what he believed. His vision was crystal clear with a relentless pursuit of one thing. At his execution his final word exclaimed that one thing.

“Freedom!”

As leaders all three of the above are needed. Passion fuels us on the days we want to quit. Wisdom informs our decisions. Ultimately if we are trying to accomplish anything of significance it requires the hearts of the people. Are we living out what we are leading? Do we use the product? Do we serve alongside others in the cause? Are we willing to sacrifice to keep the vision alive? Big questions. Hard questions. Maybe you need someone to help you clarify your vision or help you break through the barriers to living into your passion as a leader. Contact me and let’s discover any way I may be able to help you raise your leadership level to be an even greater warrior for what you lead. Lead Well.

Aug

2021

Olympic Mindset for Leaders

I was watching the end of the men’s 1500 meter swim race. I am not a swimmer. Actually, I am more of a drowner. Watching this was mind boggling for all of us as each of my boys were sharing how they would have drowned by the end of the first lap.

The American swimmer was holding a pace between third and fourth during the race.

Then they hit the last lap.

Finke starts closing the gap and reaches the wall to push off before the final length. He explodes off the wall staying under water long enough to gain ground. As he comes out of the water, he overtakes the leader to reach the finish with plenty of room to spare.

While watching this and the women’s 100 meter track race later I thought of three principles these athletes teach us about toughness that all leaders can apply.

Focus

At the end of Finke’s race during his interview they asked what was going on in his mind during that final length. I imagine all sorts of thoughts raced through his head such as “I am exhausted,” “I can’t swim anymore,” “my body hurts,” or even “I want to quit.” None of these thoughts dominated. What dominated was the voice of his coach yelling in his head not to quit.

When it gets hard where does our focus go? As leaders we often want to quit. The climb feels too hard. The challenges look to big. (As an aside, if you aren’t experiencing these feelings ever I would ask: is your vision big enough?) I like what John Maxwell says in his book Sometimes You Win, Sometimes You Learn:

“Not being controlled by our feelings means that we can face our fears, get out of our comfort zone, and try new things.”

Long before that evening Bobby Finke had developed the discipline to control his feelings in such a way he could focus on results.

Coaching

As I mentioned, in the post-race interview Finke said how he heard his coach’s voice in his head. I would assume all those other thoughts were competing, but his coach had not only helped him develop his body, but also his mind. As leaders we need someone in our corner to help us with our mental game.

I spent well over a decade helping athletes develop and when I launched the business I was amazed how many mental battles I had to face. I too need someone in my corner just like an athlete to encourage, challenge, and help me think. Who is the coach in your corner and who do you need to be a coach to?

Trust the Process

As I was watching this race I thought he must have had a plan. He did not get out front and hold the lead of this long race. He paced himself strategically. When the time was right, he burst ahead. I am certain for years he has raced with this process and seen positive results.

I wonder if he ever got bored and wanted to try a new method. Maybe. The process of timing worked so he trusted it. As leaders we need to innovate as John mentioned above, but we also need to trust the processes that work and know the right timing to make our move as Finke did.

As a leader how are you doing in these areas. Just like sports, leadership is a mental game. Who do you have in your corner to coach you and help you win the mental game? Need help thinking into your timing or with focus? If these are areas you need to grow in contact me at randy@wheelercoachingsystems.com and let’s discover if I can help you reach Olympic level results in your leadership. Lead Well.

Jul

2021

Leadership Perception vs. Reality

In one of my early jobs one boss shared the thought: “perception is reality.” I was really annoyed by that statement. I figured it didn’t matter what people perceived about who I was because I know who I really am and my character.

Character is absolutely more important than reputation which is an overflow of how people perceive us. Something I read recently caused me to think more into this idea of perception. While reading Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen I came across the following statement:

“We judge ourselves by our intentions, while others judge us by our impacts.”

Intentions

Let’s say you are at work, and you see someone struggling to communicate their thoughts in a meeting. You want to help so you jump in and add to the conversation or give advice later on how to present more effectively. Your desire is to help them grow, develop, and succeed so you jump in or provide feedback. That intention is an overflow of your character.

This is your perspective.

Impact

You see this co-worker the next day and he is avoiding you. At one point you are together alone and can feel the tension. Since you care about the relationship and are completely confused as to what is going on, you ask:

“Hey Jim, what’s wrong?”

Silence

“Did I do something because it seems you are really frustrated?”

“Well, since you asked . . . “ Jim at this point strongly unleashes feedback as to how he did not want any advice and felt like he looked incompetent when you jumped in during the meeting.

You stand in shock while experiencing the impact of your actions even though they had pure intentions. They were perceived as overstepping your bounds.

Put on Different Shoes

I remember reading in the classic book To Kill A Mockingbird a conversation between two primary characters encouraging the value of putting themself in another person’s shoes. I must continually pause and ask myself before I speak or act: how will this impact the other person? This is especially important if we are in a position of power over another person. What may seem like a trivial statement to you as the leader may impact in a deeper way.

What does all this mean? We need to pause long enough to consider how what we are going to say could be perceived by the other person?

I would suggest two ideas. First, authenticity and appropriate transparency will decrease the probability of a mismatch between intention and impact. The more people know us as leaders the greater probability of understanding our intention and our words or actions having the intended impact. Second, take a moment to read the e-mail before you press send or think about how what you are about to say needs to be delivered. Not just the words, but also the tone of voice and your body language.

I guess my boss was kind of right at least that perception does influence reality in the mind of the listener or watcher.

Do you need help in how you communicate with those you lead? If so, let’s connect and maybe a Maxwell Communication Impact Report and debrief would be a great first step for you. Click here to set up a discovery call so I can help you grow your impact as a leader in this area. Lead Well!

Jul

2021

Communicating with Candor and Care

Recently I was involved in a couple difficult conversations. Actually, I was on the receiving end.

If you’ve had that experience and truth was spoken, then you know the internal processing that can occur afterwards. As I was reflecting how I need to learn and grow from each conversation I realized I haven’t always handled difficult conversations well with others.

I don’t have the time to go in depth on this idea. Not too long ago I did a webinar on the topic and a couple books that can help you go deeper on this topic are Radical Candor and Crucial Conversations. Looking back on some of the difficult conversations I’ve had with others I should have and will apply in the future the following principles.

Relationship is Paramount

“Only when you care about the whole person with your whole self can you build a relationship.”

Kim Scott

I tend to be a very direct person especially when it comes to confrontation. That strength is also a weakness. Because I do not hesitate to confront a problem, I can hurt others. In this desire to quickly deal with the issue and get to a solution I may fail to consider the relationship. Let me explain.

As Kim Scott says above, we must care about the whole person. Often as leaders we address performance or behavior issues. I have had to do that often, but in my desire to quickly address the issue I have failed to communicate in a manner that truly values the person. Before having the candid conversation consider how you can carefully communicate in a manner that expresses how you value the individual as a person while not glossing over the real problem.

Remove Ego

I am good at over-reacting. Ask my three sons. I find often the over-reaction comes out of my ego being hurt. Ego is simply one’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance. We all have an ego, but sometimes they get hurt. Here are a few signs ego is getting in the way:

Being right is more important that doing what is right for everyone.
We are frustrated because others are not doing what we want them to do.
We are digging our heels in to argue why we are not at fault in the issue.

If you see these signs within you during a difficult conversation, then check your ego. One way I find helpful is reminding myself to keep the big picture in mind. Another way is the final idea below.

Listen

In my book 25 Ways to Lead Better at Work and Home I highlight the levels of listening so I will not cover that here. The third idea I realized is in my desire to quickly address the problem and solve it, I failed to listen. I missed Steven Covey’s principle of seeking first to understand before being understood.

When we must have a difficult conversation, we may not know the entire story. Maybe performance has dropped or behavior is off at this moment because of a personal problem. Possibly there was poor communication and expectations were unclear. Before launching into the confrontation take a moment to ask questions. Get curious where you are frustrated, and you may realize the issue was not as bad as you thought.

As I said, I am still growing in this area. Which of these areas do you need to develop? If you want to dive deeper into the issue e-mail me at randy@wheelercoachingsystems.com and I can send you a link to the webinar on the topic so you can dive deeper. Enter into the mess of the difficult conversation with candor and care. Lead Well.

Jul

2021

Learning from a Local Government Leader

I was talking to a man who has had the opportunity to lead in the private sector and now serves at a local level in the public sector. This leader who moved from Ames, Iowa to the Indianapolis, Indiana area to work for a medical equipment company and eventually owned one for well over a decade. After selling this company he entered public service.

While we talked, my goal was to understand his top leadership principles. Before diving into his top three principles, I learned the core of his success is his optimism. This optimism carried him through multiple business setbacks which I do not have time to cover here.

This is not a Pollyanna, roses and sunshine optimism. A deeply embedded determination rooted in optimism that there is a solution and he just has to find it. This echoes Napoleon Hill’s idea when he says:

“a few people know from experience the soundness of persistence. They are the ones who have not accepted defeat as being anything more than temporary.”

Combined with his optimism a few principles have risen to be guides in how he leads.

Empathy

In shifting from the private sector to the public sector this skill has grown. As a business owner it can be tempting to lead in a dictatorial manner which may be “easy”, but not healthy. When we take this posture, we lead at a position level of leadership. This works . . . until it doesn’t. I am not suggesting Jeff was a dictatorial leader when he owned his business, but when one shifts from business owner to public service, they have less power.

This is where empathy comes in. As a leader he had to take time to “walk in another man’s shoes.” This ability enables him to lead at what John Maxwell calls a “permission” level of leadership based on relationships. If we want to win the hearts of those we lead empathy helps others know we care. When they know we care they are more inclined to follow our lead.

Humility

Young leaders are often tempted to think they must have all the answers. Through his years of experience in life and leadership Jeff understands this is not the case. Not only does he understand this, but he is willing to admit he does not have all the answers. This posture has enabled him to understand his weaknesses and fill those weak areas with people who are strong where he is not.

This humility combines with the empathy described previously. Jeff suggested that for one to have empathy “my feelings have to be superseded by our/your feelings.” In other words, we must put the needs of others in front of our personal needs and as a public servant this is crucial. I would also suggest a leader in any sector will greatly benefit from this frame of mind.

Communication

As I work with leaders and organizations this is the biggest area of challenge. Communication has multiple layers and Jeff emphasized the importance of constant communication as a leader. What makes this so important? Collaboration.

A healthy organization or team is collaborative which opens the door to creativity. This collaboration can eliminate always dealing with the “squeaky wheel.” At times as leaders we must simply inform, but I will dive deeper into collaboration and informing in a later post. For now, the important principle is that we must communicate often as leaders especially when we are leading a large group of people.

While wrapping up our time Jeff shared with his biggest leadership idea which I want to share with you.

“No matter what challenge you receive it will get better as you pursue the right thing and keep pushing on with great people around you.”

Leadership is not easy and growing as a leader is critical. Jeff has modeled that in his growth in the above listed areas. Which of these areas do you need to grow in? Need help thinking into that growth? Schedule a thirty-minute thinking partner session at no cost to you so I can help you think into your leadership results. Lead Well.

Jul

2021

Red, White and Blue Leadership

As we celebrate the freedom our forefathers fought to provide over two hundred years ago, I reflected on the significance of the colors on our flag. Three colors. Each with a meaning.

Not long ago I learned marketing experts employ psychological reasons in choosing colors. Not only did I research the significance of each color on the flag, but also the marketing significance. As I explore the meaning behind each color permit me to reflect on leadership qualities they also teach us.

Red

The significance of this color is valor and bravery. From a marketing perspective this color denotes excitement, passion, danger, energy and action. Our founding fathers saw the danger in the fight they were pursuing to be freed from the tyranny of the British. In spite of the obvious danger a burning passion fueled by valor and bravery pushed them forward.

As a leader you have a passion for what you lead whether at work, home, or in the community. Some days you may feel like you are alone in that pursuit. In the beginning you often felt alone before you formed a team. In these dark moments, leaders tap into their passion to move ahead bravely even in light of the possibility of complete failure.

White

This color represents purity and innocence. Marketers use this color to denote peace, calm, hope, and comfort. I imagine what drove the founders of this nation to fight for freedom was not a lust for power, but a pure and innocent desire to live a life that no longer experienced oppression. Through the blood they shed we as a country experience a country founded on peace, hope, and purity.

Leaders must check their motives often to guard against the temptations of power and control. These powerful tempters can lead us astray and distract the team we lead. Take a moment and consider the motives behind the agenda you are pursuing. Is it for personal gain or for the good of everyone? When we put others first, we often have pure and innocent intentions.

Blue

I have frequently heard leadership expert John Maxwell say anything worthwhile is uphill. This color represents vigilance, perseverance, and justice. Marketers use it to convey trust and reliability. As the founding fathers gained their freedom they must have recognized this uphill climb and included blue as a reminder to be vigilant to protect the freedom they fought for.

Watching is one thing, but we also must continue to move forward toward the goal amidst continual challenges. Our nation continues to watch, persevere, and fight for what is right to be a beacon of trust and reliability. This is true for leaders at work, home, and in our communities. We must persevere to fight for what is right and true and continually press on toward the goal we are compelled and given to pursue. The climb is hard but continue to daily take the next step.

Those who continue to fight for our freedom. Thank you. Those who are fighting your own battles in what you lead I hope this encourages you to continue to be brave, pure, and persevere. You have what it takes to lead what you have been entrusted with. Lead Well.