Happiness. What is it? In 2006 actor Will Smith starred in the movie The Pursuit of Happyness which chronicles the life of Chris Gardner and his perseverance in becoming a financial planner with Dean Witter in the early 80’s.
This movie chronicles the pursuit, but it also illustrates the life of a father. Tired of the struggles Gardner’s girlfriend leaves him and he and his five-year-old son. Because of a promise to always be involved in his son’s life, Gardner refuses to leave his son behind.
Gardner stuck to this choice even through the struggles of being homeless and daily attempting to secure a place to sleep. Because of this reality Chris had to get as much work accomplished before 5:00 PM that his fellow interns were accomplishing with two more hours. Each day he had to pick up his son and rush to the homeless shelter in order to secure a spot to sleep.
Not only does this movie capture the perseverance necessary to accomplish one’s dream, but there are some poignant lessons on fatherhood.
A father can crush a dream.
During one scene Gardner is shooting baskets with his son who is very excited and has dreams of accomplishing great goals as a basketball player. Gardner unintentionally crushes his dream saying his son will probably not excel at basketball and he shouldn’t be shooting the ball all day and night. Immediately this crushes his son as he throws the ball down and starts placing it in a plastic bag to throw it out.
A father can inspire.
Moments after Gardner’s crushing statement, he realizes what he has done and pauses as he looks over the city landscape and captures the opportunity to be a father who inspires. As he stands at the fence he says:
“Don’t ever let someone tell you that you can’t do something . . . even me. You got a dream, you’ve gotta protect it. . . . If you want something, go get it. Period.”*
After these words his son’s spirits lift immediately at the encouragement of his father. A father’s job is to admit his mistakes and build up his children to be the people they were destined to become.
A father provides.
This stage of Gardner’s life was very difficult. As the father we see him providing protection, shelter, and love. When they are first kicked out of the hotel they were staying at, Gardner has to take both of them to a bathroom to spend the night. In this bathroom he hits his lowest point. As his son sleeps on his lap he provides protection while someone pounds on the door outside the bathroom. In this one moment you see the love of a father for his son through providing safety and security.
A father perseveres.
I am not sure what drove Gardner to live in homeless shelters and put him and his son through so many struggles. I assume his vision of providing a better life for his son drove him. This vision must have given him strength to persevere through sleepless nights, discouraging circumstances, setbacks and multiple challenges. In the end through all the perseverance which his five year old son could not begin to understand he was victorious. He ended in a position to provide a much better life for his family.
As you look at these lessons, what do you need to grow in? Do you accidently crush your child’s dreams? Do you need to intentionally inspire? Or do you simply need to persevere through the challenges of your life and provide for those you love today? Whatever the issue I challenge you to be the parent your child needs you to be especially if you feel like quitting. Your child needs a positive example and you may be all there is so rise up and be that person. Lead well.
©2021 Wheeler Coaching Systems, All Rights Reserved
. rare among Junior High aged boys. This year is his Senior year in college and my son and I drove about four and a half hours so I could be sure to see him play at least once.